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im back. from st. martin. from my 1 month long (or was it longer?) hibernation. and from donno where.

i dont feel like typing though. i dont feel like doing anything at all. i donno why.

i feel like screaming at the top of my voice. but i dont. i sit here, feeling cold and a little bit numb. and typing whatever comes to my mind.

do i feel lonely? i donno. for quite sometime, everything started to seem meaningless. i donno from when. dont even care. do i dare, do i dare, disturb the universe? now why did i quote prufrock all of a sudden? i donno. i dont even care. wow..looks like this is my theme song, 'i donno, i dont even care, i donno, i dont even care...' i wish i could sing this song, though it doesnt have any tune. it needs a tune.

wasnt it supposed to be fun? caring about nothing? then why is it so goddamn boring for me? may be im weird. nope, not may be. i am weird.

i hate the work im doing rite now. but is there any job i'd like? i donno. i dont even care.

useless ramblings. well, this blog is for useless ramblings like this. and it is full of it. useless shit. do i care to be useful? i donno. i dont even care.

what do i prefer? arms dealing? or some goddamn block in some shitty place in ireland? i donno. i dont even care.

should i stop? i donno, i dont even care!