comfortably numb

i dont know what is happening to me these days. but are things happening to me at all? its more like things are happening to everybody else around me and im just watching and going with the flow. the most alarming thing is, i dont feel anything...even the alarm! may be its better this way, may be it's not. who knows?

thinking about leaving my job. the reason is as usual, unusual! i dont feel that the team needs me. it's kinda weird, cause nobody directly said or indicated that, except one. and i shouldn't go by one person's indication only, i know that...but i feel uncomfortable with the situation. im always being unsure of myself there, i dont know why...is it the atmosphere? or the indication that im too dumb for the job? or may be its because they still kind of consider myself as an entry-level after 6 months of work? or may be i still am in the entry level. why not? 6 months is not much...and anyways, i dont go to office 7 days a week, dont work day and night, dont eat and sleep work like the others do,,,i was never a workaholic, and never will be. not that anybody is pushing me to be a workaholic...

there i go bla-bla-ing again. wish i could write something funny or intellectual...wish i could interact with people more...wish i could escape somewhere...escape from this state of my mind,,, escape from the people i know,,, from the known boring sky that im under, from this dull city, from this terribly mundane world. or even better, from myself!